January 29, 2010

Darcy and the Vikings

I returned from a warm and sunny Dallas business trip the night of the final Vikings game of the season.   I opened my front door expecting to see my faithful 8-month old hellion kitten Darcy waiting at the door, but she was nowhere to be found.  I found a note on my kitchen counter from my catsitter neighbor, a single woman who lives right across the hall.  The note read, “I wasn’t sure what time you’d be home.  Darcy is at my place watching the Vikings game.”

In 3 years, my neighbor hasn’t once invited me over to her apartment for any kind of socializing.  I found it quite  hilarious that my kitten would get invited over instead.  My neighbor was very reluctant to give Darcy up - she let me know it too, in a joking kind of way.   Since Darcy reeked  of second-hand smoke, she had probably been spending a lot of time at my neighbor’s.  A coworker of mine kidded, “You better be careful or we’ll be seeing Darcy’s little kitten face on the sides of milk cartons!”  :)  

Just another whacky Minnesota occurence – my neighbor chooses to stay home alone rather than joining me for Xmas dinner  – but when I’m out of town, she invites my kitten over for a Viking’s game.  There must be a short story in there somewhere.  :)  

My Dallas trip did me a world of good – my world seemed to open back up – lots of bright sunshine, light clothing and more social contact with many different people than I’ve had in a long time.  It cemented my decision that Minnesota and I aren’t a good fit.   Being cooped up inside for 5 months with very little people contact just isn’t good for me – I’m way too social for this “Thoreau on Walden (frozen) pond” life I’m living.

Perhaps Minnesotans really are more introverted – or they adjust to being so, being inside 5 months of the year.  I’d imagine you develop unusually close family ties because your family is all you see during these winters, for the mostpart.  So I guess I’m understanding better why transplants find it harder to break in.  I also understand a lot better why I need to leave.

I’ve hit the acceptance stride now on Minnesota.  I’m wiser – I really don’t take things as personally anymore because it is what it is.  My choice is to stay and wage an uphill social battle or go.  There are no guarantees it will be easier to make strong social connections in Maryland single and in my mid 40’s.  However, I can pretty much go to a coffee shop or find another diversion outside my apartment during the winter months a lot more easily without subzero temps and worries of black ice.  Minnesota is not for the weather faint of heart, that’s for sure.  

Heading to a transplants meetup tonight – should be fun.

JTM

January 10, 2010

Coffee Talk

Today my new friend Jo and I met for coffee.   She’s a Minnesota native who has lived in California and other places and traveled extensively.  I met her in my non-fiction book club this past fall – we both joined the group the same evening.  I was pleased that she gave me her card afterwards and told me she’d teach me to cross-country ski so I could learn to “embrace the winter.” 

So far, no skiing – too cold – but we’ve had coffee a few times.  We have several things in common – we both have the name Jo, we share the same lucky number – 6, we seem to like and dislike the same books at the book club meetings, and we both struggle with winter!  :)   The terrific thing is we always end up talking several hours and it’s always a ”meat and potatoes” conversation with depth.  Conversations like that – either in person or on the phone long distance – are the best cure I’ve found for winter’s solitary hibernation.  The sun and brilliant sky were also uplifting today, despite the chilly temps hovering around zero.  

My “winter survival tool kit” also features my kitten Darcy who found me back in November at PetsMart.  I wasn’t looking for a cat as my 14 year old cat Fruity was on chemotherapy for cancer.  But Darcy pushed all the right “I’m SO CUTE!” buttons.  I tapped the glass of her pen and she came running up to press her face to the glass like we were old friends.  When I took her out, she nuzzled right into my neck and stayed on my lap an hour – so docile.  I believe in signs and Darcy, like my 14 year old cat Fruity, was a tabby female from Ohio.   I thought it was interesting that Darcy would be imported here from the Buckeye state.    Little did I know the hellion rascal I would encounter once I got her home!

Let’s see – she jumps into the dishwasher and the refrigerator, onto my laptop, onto kitchen counters, onto tables – the spray bottle and I can hardly keep up with her – perpetual motion!  She has knocked over chairs and even managed to lock herself in the bathroom.  (Yes, really.)  She fetches a ball and drops it in my bed in the middle of the night when I’m sleeping.  She chews jewelry, pounces on my earrings (when I’m wearing them) and I found 20 pens stashed under my couch.  Perhaps she was a dog in another life…  Trainable?  Not so much.  Worth every minute?  Definitely!   :)

JTM